Bingo.
I resisted the urge to add an exclamation point to that title because, well, I knew I was going to win.
I’m not one for thrill rides—I don’t like amusement parks nor any kind of climbing activity. I don’t jump out of planes or eat food that is still moving or look over balconies more than three stories up. My son has a VR rollercoaster game that I played once—I had to sit down and close my eyes for parts of it because I was afraid of falling over.
But I do play Bingo. It is my adrenaline rush. It has all the feels:
Alcohol—churches (and especially Catholic churches) know that the best way to separate you from your money is via a few $3 cans of hard seltzer. Hellfire & brimstone works too, but may not get as many repeat customers.
Community—tons of people turn out for these things. Generally, you have to get there way before the games start if you want to get a seat. Part of the thrill is just getting in the door.
Colored markers—the daubers you get to mark your Bingo card are amazeballs. All the kitsch and color you’d expect. Mine is hot pink ink with a decorative disco ball on top.
Lame humor—it’s O69, everyone!
Cash prizes—money just finds you.
I saw a movie back at the end of the last century called “Highway 61”. I can tell you nothing about it other than the main character was the devil (Mr. Skin), and it had a Bingo scene.
Unsurprisingly, Mr. Skin won every game.
Bingo Angry Woman:
He must be cheating that's how.
Mr. Skin (A.K.A. Satan):
Lady, you can't cheat at bingo. If you could, I would, but you can't. I won because I was lucky - lucky to wind up in a town full of losers!
I didn’t win every game, but I did win three of 14. Well, two—but my husband won one, so I am counting it. So I have $100 to spend just in time for my birthday…(insert wavy fade/reflective expression and dream sounds).
What gifts can I give myself with $100 that can help me “ambush fear with my ferocious dream?”
Take my bad self to breakfast and order two entrees (breakfast & breakfast dessert)
Go shopping and buy nothing (or only one thing)
Get new pens & notebooks. (Yes. No. Yes. NO! yes?)
Pay someone to help me do something (there are people who know more than me AND I don’t have to know everything anyway)
Buy a pair of Birkenstocks (they’re so expensive, but I’ve always wanted a pair).
Buy something at full price in the color I want because I want it (I don’t always have to choose what’s on sale).
Hide it in a book or a coat pocket so I can be excited when I find it again (I’m not so desperate that I can’t lose $100).
Give it away (I’m not so desperate that I can’t part with $100).
Save it (I pray I am never so desperate that I don’t have $100).
Take it as salary for accepting the work of ambushing fears with my ferocious dream with this blog post (not a huge salary, but not bad for an hour’s work).
What is my ferocious dream? Doing this—writing these blogs, hosting this site, sharing my words with those who want to hear them.
What is my fear? Doing this—writing these blogs, hosting this site, sharing my words with those who want to hear them.
What does a $100 ambush look like? Pretty much like any other ambush except someone forgot to remove the price tag.
